Relationship Psychology · 90 secs

Gottman Stonewalling & Silent Treatment Trauma Screener (John Gottman Model)

Framework: Dr. John Gottman Four Horsemen Relational Model & Autonomic Flooding Theory · 100% Private & Free

Identify whether emotional shutdown during conflict is autonomic nervous system flooding (>100 bpm) or manipulative silent treatment, and measure its relational impact.

Scientific Overview

Stonewalling is one of the Gottman Four Horsemen of relationship breakdown, occurring when a partner completely withdraws, becomes unresponsive, and refuses to engage. In 85% of cases, stonewalling is driven by Diffuse Physiological Arousal (DPA) where heart rate exceeds 100 bpm and cognitive processing shuts down. Conversely, punitive silent treatment is weaponized ostracism designed to punish or control.

What This Assessment Evaluates

  • Measures Autonomic Flooding (DPA tachycardia, fight-or-flight saturation), Shutdown & Emotional Withdrawal, and Punitive Cold Silence
  • Differentiates protective nervous system collapse from abusive silent treatment and narcissistic manipulation
  • Actionable Gottman 20-minute physiological timeout protocol and low-arousal repair attempts

How to Take This Test

  1. Answer honestly based on your experience over the past 7 days.
  2. There are no right or wrong answers; trust your initial emotional reaction.
  3. Receive your personalized score breakdown, mascot insight, and custom journaling prompts immediately.

Frequently Asked Questions

What is the difference between stonewalling and taking a healthy space break?

A healthy break states: 'I feel overwhelmed right now, let's take 20 minutes to calm down and return.' Stonewalling shuts down without warning, walks out, avoids eye contact, or gives the silent treatment for days without repair.

Why does stonewalling feel so painful to the partner?

Being stonewalled activates the dorsal anterior cingulate cortex-the same brain region that registers physical pain. It triggers primal abandonment panic and dysregulates the attachment system.

Medical Disclaimer

Medical Disclaimer: This instrument is designed for personal self-awareness, emotional tracking, and educational purposes. It is not a clinical diagnosis, psychological treatment, or a substitute for licensed psychiatric care.

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